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Good Idea, Bad Idea: What Kind of Liquids Can I Put In My Bong?

GLASS-BONGS

It’s one of the greatest questions of our time. Professional stoners have debated with one another about it over and over, and over again – and there’s never a single answer that smokers will agree on. So I poured over research on the subject and got my hands dirty testing each of the possibilities. So let’s get to it: “What kind of liquids can I put in my bong?”

 

Milk

I’ve been to many a hookah bar in my time, and some of the most legit ones offer a milk-filled hookah. And it’s freaking delicious. But tobacco and weed are two completely different substances, and for that reason I recommend that you don’t fill your bong with milk. Milk has fat cells that absorb THC and greatly reduces your buzz. Then again, skim milk has almost no fat, so if you’re really curious I’d suggest you use that. Watch out though, it has a tendency to bubble all the up to your mouth, and bongmilk tastes even worse than bongwater. Bad idea.

 

Liquor

You shouldn’t have to even think about this one to figure out that this is a terrible idea: 1. you just wasted 1-4 shots of liquor, and 2. it’s freaking liquor. It burns enough going down when you drink it, imagine how it feels when you smoke it (technically). I tried this one way back when I was a stupid high school student (using vodka), and I immediately regretted it. Just don’t do it. Really, really bad idea.

 

Carbonated Drinks (Including Beer)

Contrary to popular belief, sugar in no way influences the THC content of your smoke (heard right from the mouth of a chemist). But what about carbonation? Carbonated drinks are not only loaded with sugar, but they also contain a little gas called Carbon Dioxide. I’m no Biology major, but I’m fairly sure that breathing IN Carbon Dioxide, the waste that our lungs normally try to expel every few seconds, is probably not good for you. But then again there are conflicting opinions on the subject: some people say that you’re totally safe from CO2, and that you just need to clean your piece afterward to prevent stickiness. Even if that’s true, the cons outweigh the pros – probably a bad idea.

 

Tobacco Flavoring Drops

Most people try different liquids in their waterpipes for one of two reasons: 1. to produce a smoother hit than you would get with water, or 2. to add some kind of flavor to your smoke. If you’re going for the latter, then this is probably the right thing for you. Some people I know swear by adding a few drops of tobacco flavoring to their bongwater to change it up a bit. They seem to be an “okay idea.”

 

Mouthwash

listerine

I’ll admit that I haven’t, and probably never will, try putting mouthwash (alcohol-free, of course) in my bong. Mint never did agree with me, and Listerine always made me sick to my stomach. But I have heard from numerous sources that it’s definitely the way to go in terms of flavoring. Just make sure not to use too much of it, it bubbles like crazy. Good idea if you’re into that kinda thing.

 

Juice

Now we finally get to the juice. You can go ahead and try them out, but clean your piece thoroughly after use, because it can become a sticky situation. This goes double time for OJ and grape juice because they have the potential to stain your bong. If you’re all OCD about waterpipe cleanliness, then you should avoid ALL juices. But they do change the texture and flavor of the smoke more significantly (most of the time in a good way) than any other liquid on this list so far. Good idea, but only if you’re a responsible bongkeeper.

 

Gatorade/Flavored Drinks

Gatorade and other watery flavored drinks, like Vitamin Water, provide a nice counterpoint to the thickness of juices: It won’t change the taste or texture as much, but you have less to worry about in terms of permanent staining or irreparable stickiness. READ: That doesn’t mean you can leave this crap in your bong, it just means it’s slightly easier to clean out. It’ll still get gross if you don’t clean it regularly. Like as soon as you’re done using it. But it’s a slightly better idea for the stoners out there who like to leave their waterpipe filled during the day.

 

Tea

This one is my personal favorite. There are so many different types of tea that you can explore and try out…just make sure none of them have honey in them, and try to stay light on the sugar, if any at all. You can use hot tea (which is good for your throat, but lets more tar through – an idea that is still disputed), or ice that shit for a deliciously smooth hit. There’s an infinite amount of teas and tea combinations out there in the world, so get to toking. Good idea.

 

Almond Extract

almond-extract

When I found out that someone actually did this I was like “WHAA?” But it does make sense. Extracts are literally pure flavor, so if you drop just a tiny bit of almond extract (or any kind of cooking extract, really) in your bongwater, I imagine it would taste AMAZING. Don’t take my word on this one though: I haven’t tried it, and I didn’t look into the repercussions of doing it. There’s not much research out there about it, so if you’re an adventurer I suggest you try it out and let me know what you think. Remember not to add too much. Potentially an amazing idea.

 

Water

If you really aren’t feeling any of my suggestions, and/or totally disagree with some of the things I’ve said, then why don’t you just stick to plain old water? Always a good idea.

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