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How To Be The Campus Hustler

biggie smalls

 

Hi, my name is Graham Sellington, and I move drugs motherfucker. Or, at least I used to. Now I’m busy scratching my way up the corporate ladder trying to make the most of my degree. But rather than go into that, I’m going to teach you something that you’ll be able to cash in on now, and that you’ll learn to apply to all facets of your life. The late great Biggy Smalls gave us the Ten Crack Commandments. Well unfortunately, crack aint my game and I bet it aint yours either, so lets talk about something that applies.

Ultimately, the world is divided into two different kinds of people: Hustlers and Customers. Now, being a hustler isn’t necessarily a job title. It’s more like a way of life. Everything in life should be approached as a hustle. You set the terms, you dictate how it plays out, and you cash in on the rewards. A customer on the other hand, is told the rules, and he plays along.

marijuana dealer

This installment is going to focus on hustling in its original form, moving product. Let’s start with the merchandise. This is where you have to make some decisions. Depending on which product you choose to distribute, both the risk and rewards will change. Because of this, most hustlers start with weed. It’s relatively inexpensive, easily obtainable, and your first offense will most likely end with a slap on the wrist. ACOD…cake walk motherfucker. You start putting yourself in risk of jail time when you get into coke, pills, acid, or the brown lady. Keep in mind that your customers, especially in a college setting, will most likely be the people you hang out with. All I’m saying is I wouldn’t want to be on the way back from class to find someone hanging outside of my apartment clawing at their skin. Just not my style. Probably not going to help your pussy game either.

Let’s be real though. As a campus hustler you owe it to your classmates to be prepared to provide for all types of experiences. And that means expanding the breadth of your wares. Let me explain: There once was a time when the average college partier had to go see three different people before preparing for their nights festivities (weed, xanex, coke). Take advantage of this by being a one stop shop. This will increase your risk, but will substantially affect your return. Staying on top in this game is all about staying on the top of your customer’s recent call list. That’s the only Top 10 list you should be worrying about.

hustler money

This leads me to another point. As is in every other profitable enterprise, cash is king. Even though the practice of buying bulk for deeper discounts is promising, always keep plenty of cash on hand. You wouldn’t want to have an empty safe and a closet full of weed when an amazing batch of mushrooms comes through. It also doesn’t hurt to take advantage of the generosity of your friends parents. My first re-up in college was financed by my roommate and the kid across the hall. Your job is to network. Be a familiar face, but keep your name on the low. A nickname helps, but you have to go with it from the start and then stay consistent. Stay away from ‘Fat Saks’, I got that shit trademarked.

Once you’ve identified what you want to sell,  you then need to find a connect. If you know someone from home whose willing to do some trafficking, you’ll have an edge on the competition, as far as quality goes. The only problem is you’ll be paying a heavy delivery charge to your driver and you leave yourself open to a Jux (Jux: joo-ks, from the Latin ‘run your shit’, means you got fucked and they forgot to kiss you). Your best bet is to find a local connect. Hopefully you can find some seniors who have already established themselves in the area.

boys in the hood

If all else fails, head to the hood. No matter what hood you’re in, there is a universal language among hustlers. As you’re slowly driving by, make eye contact with the flyest dressed dude on the street. If he tilts his chin up in acknowledgment, you’re in. If he tilts his chin down, keep your head low and hit the gas. Always remember these three rules: 1. Everything is negotiable. 2. A price too good to be true, usually is. And 3. NEVER let anyone hold your cash until you have the product. If someone tells you, “give me the money, I’m just running inside and I’ll be right back.” you’re getting set up.

Once you get the product, now it’s time to start moving it. Build up your client base, stay true to your word, and never have your phone out of arm’s reach. The rest will work itself out.

Stay tuned to the Campus Socialite for future installments of the ‘Hustler’s Ambition’ where I’ll go into detail on building up your client base, expanding your team, killing the competition, consignment, and hustling in the real world. Keep working, keep moving, and most of all, keep hustling

**If you have any questions, you can reach me at 1-900-HUSTLER. *Charges may apply*

 

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