Introducing “The Football.” An All-Out Party In A Suitcase

the football

Pre-gaming never looked so epic. Urban Mercenaries, a small NYC-based company has taken the historic art of drinking before you go out (or even after) and compacted it into one, James Bond looking suitcase. Hence the name “The Football,” an homage to JFK’s codeword for bomb coordinates and such as they were transferred from point to point via metal suitcases. Never lose The Football. Someone should tell The Jets.

mark sanchez fumble

Basically what you get is a suitcase packed with everything you can possibly need for a hotel party, pre-game, and/or house party. We all know what a pain in the ass it is picking up supplies. You forgot the Red Bull, Britney doesn’t like Tequila, my stomach hurts, blah blah blah. The Football has you covered.

the football

Shot glasses, Grey Goose, Patron, and anything else you could possibly ask for. Not only that, it comes engraved with whatever 2 lines of text you desire, and a pair of handcuffs so you can strap it to the guest of honor and never let them get more than a foot away. Picture yourself walking into your hotel at Atlantic City, right by a group of girls, with a briefcase handcuffed to your wrist. Dare them not to ask what’s in the box.

james bond briefcase

The price is a little on the hefty side ($499), but keep in mind, the briefcase is custom engraved and re-usable, along with the shot glasses and the handcuffs – sounds like a party in itself. Suffice to say, unless you are really a baller, this thing is for really really special occasions. No matter though. It’s like buying a Tux. The second you own one, the Tux-worthy occasions just start to pile up. Get The Football here, and make sure I’m invited.

 

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