Sex in college isn’t hard to come by, but in case you’re one of the of few guys who has tried to bed a few girls to no avail, we’ve got three words for you: try something different. Gold diggers will always exist, and then there’s those girls who will be impressed by the simplest shit on the planet. These types of women are constant, but your approach should change. Remember when an ugly man would use his Ferrari convertible as an extension for his small penis and a status symbol to get women? Those same type of men have upped their game, and are using their billion dollar apartments instead. Women drop their panties for a nice place, according to two men interviewed in a New York Post Article, and your dorm may not have floor-to-ceiling windows or a state-of-the-art kitchen with stainless steel appliances, but there are ways you can trick your dorm out that’ll have the ladies falling at your door. Campus Socialite Guaranteed.
Conversation through Decoration
As a girl, I can’t believe I’m giving you guys this info. I feel like I’m in cohorts with the enemy. Despite that, the best way to even get a girl into your dorm is to have something that will get her attention. I once dated a guy who had a huge head sculpture in his bedroom. The first time we went to his house, that was the first thing he mentioned. I saw that trap coming a mile away, but I had to admit that the sculpture was pretty cool. He later disclosed how it had worked with other women. Cover your walls with nothing but posters or interesting wall decals. It’ll give her the sense of being somewhere other than in a dorm room. Play some music (nothing slow or cheesy), spit some serious game and watch it all unfold.
Hide all the Chairs
Make sure there are no chairs in your dorm room and all the counter tops are cluttered. Having nowhere to sit forces her to sit or lean against your bed. No girl wants to look awkward standing in the middle of a dorm room so she’ll definitely gravitate toward your bed, and that is half the battle. You can blame the missing chairs on a party in another friend’s room.
Create a Dorm Meal
You might be wondering how you two cooking can help you get laid. Girls like to feel like what they’re doing with a guy is completely new and exclusive to the two of them. Feeling of exclusivity (however delusional) = panties dropping. It’s too easy to make hamburgers or Easy Mac in a dorm, but you two can try to create a meal worthy of Top Chef. Try making pizza from scratch or quesadillas — both things you can make in a dorm room or a dorm kitchen. You can even share laughs while making mug brownies in a microwave. And when she asks why you guys never cooked again after that first time, just try to act confused.
Shots as Refreshments
Okay, you don’t have to be a Rocket Scientist to know that having alcohol in your dorm can get you laid. With RAs checking dorms several times a semester, your dorm might be drier than a recovering alcoholic’s liquor cabinet. Having a few bottles of beer or a bottle of vodka might impress any female college alcoholics. A college friend always had jello shots in his mini-fridge. It was his go-to refreshment for guests. Something small but hardcore like a jello shot might take you two from standing in front of the fridge to laying on top of the bed.
Create a Cozy Atmosphere
Nothing tops a room that seems homey. I know guys don’t have much need for a soft bed filled with pillows and blankets, but the more comfortable your space is, the more she’ll want to stay or lay there. If you’re not into having too many pillows on your bed, try a beanie bag in the room or a back support pillow for her to lean against. It’s been proven that pictures or posters help to soften up an office so try applying that same mentality to your dorm with Christmas lights or lava lamps. She’ll be so relaxed that laying on your bed seems like the only option. From there, you know what to do.
