Social media is annoyingly awesome. Apart from the networking, you get to see what people are really like inside their heads. A study from Rutgers University placed social media users into two categories: those who inform (informers), and those who post updates on their everyday lives (meformers). Amid the meformers and informers are a bunch of users who, if I had my way, would be banned for life from social media. Here are five annoying ass people you come across on Twitter. They’re even worse than the Facebook variety.
The Celebrity Nut-Hangers
Every Monday night there’s a girl on my timeline who live-tweets VH1‘s Basketball Wives, a show full of bitter, broke ex wives and former girlfriends of some of the NBA‘s biggest ballers. While giving her followers a play by play — as if they aren’t watching the same damn show — she then tweets to each of the NBA golddiggers to let them know what she thought of them during the particular episode. Annoying as fudge! Every Twitter user has that one person who hangs on the ball sack of a celebrity just hoping for a mention. Face it — Kim Kardashian doesn’t need you to tell her how hot she is. She already knows. Ashton Kutcher knows he’s the luckiest man on Earth for snagging Demi Moore, and Snoop Dogg doesn’t care that you’re rollin’ down the street, smoking indo, sippin’ on gin and juice.
The Spammers
It’s a pain when you’re having an intelligent discussion on Twitter about sex, and one single mention of the word gets you tons of replies from “Horny Russian girls ready for a good time.” I have no idea why they’re always Russian. They just are. Tweet about dieting or weight loss and tweets from some bot are coming your way about the 5 Best Diets for Obese People. There’s even a Twitter bot, YouInHakiu, that’ll tweet you if you mention #haiku. Followers are nice, but keep away from the eggs.
The Avid #Hashtag User
Twitter popularized the hashtag, you know, that thing people were calling the “number sign.” In the early days of Twitter, you only used hashtags for specific concerts or events like Comic Con (#sdcc), television shows, #musicmonday, and #followfriday. Now, phrases preceded with a hashtag follow every new user’s Tweet #knowwhatImean? It’s #annoyingasfudge to see #justsayin or #wheretheydothatat behind every sentence. Worse are the people who hashtag every bit of the sentence #asifpeoplecare. #WeDont!
The “Social” Users
To clarify, these aren’t just people who jump on every trendy social network, and have moved from Facebook to Twitter. These are people who use those 140 characters solely to communicate with others. You’ll see these constant gabbers using Twitter as if they are sending texts. It’s bad enough Nina feels it important to tell her 143 followers about where she’s going for lunch, but it’s worse seeing her and Evelyn discussing when and where they’re going to meet for lunch via Twitter. That’s what’s text messaging is for.
The Bloggers
Twitter is perfect for networking. I understand that. If you’re blogger, it’s great to Tweet the links to your articles with a few relevant hashtags for maximum exposure. However, there’s no reason to Tweet the link to that one article every hour. I follow someone who Tweets her the links to her articles at celebrities with tons of followers and famous writers. I’ve been saying the following throughout this whole article and I’ll say it one more time: No One Cares!