Whether you are in a relationship or not, you are a man or a woman, or you enjoy it or you don’t, porn is an issue for everyone. From the way that men view women to the way women feel they are supposed to behave to the way people feel about relationships, porn is an issue.
Porn is increasingly easy to obtain. It can be purchased on television, viewed at on the Internet, and purchased in bookstores. Its accessibility via the Internet means that porn is literally in your pocket — on your smartphone or tablet. But porn is not good for society or your love life.
Porn causes psychological issues for men
It might seem like something that makes men happy, but in reality porn has quite the opposite effect for them. Men who view porn with regularity tend to suffer from depression, anxiety, and controlling tendencies. They also have low self-esteem, become highly introverted, and are exceptionally narcissistic, according to psychologists at the University of Illinois at Chicago. If the man in your relationship uses porn, watch for these unattractive traits.
Porn is demeaning
It comes as no surprise that studies show porn is demeaning to women. Porn teaches those who watch that women are little more than sex slaves placed on earth with the sole purpose of pleasing men — all men. Women who view porn tend to believe their value lies in their ability to do exactly that. Men begin to see women as nothing more than objects designed to do as they say, when they say it.
Porn causes selfishness
Your love life should be primarily about love and affection. While sex does not necessarily mean love for everyone who engages, it is an intimate act that involves consideration of the other person. Porn makes people view sex as a selfish pastime. It’s no longer about mutual enjoyment and pleasure.
There’s no consequence
Perhaps the biggest factor porn has on your love life is that it sends the message that there are no consequences. Perhaps your partner is addicted to porn and thinks that as long as you don’t find out about his porn addiction or his frequent trips to the strip club, it won’t hurt you. However, porn neglects to mention side effects such as pregnancy and sexually transmitted disease. Porn also leads men to believe that all women want sex, even if they say no.
Quitting porn
Quitting porn might not be easy, but it is doable. It means accepting accountability for your actions. It means sharing your secret with someone who can help you, blocking all entry points, and facing your problems. Setting consequences for yourself each time you fail and look at porn is another good tactic for quitting. Get rid of porn. Block your ability to look at it.
Getting it done
Kicking your porn habit is going to improve your love life. Right now, it’s causing you to objectify women, it’s lowering your self-esteem, and it’s turning you into an introverted narcissist. Quitting may not be easy, but it is doable.
Much like other forms of addiction recovery, you will work to overcome porn every day for the rest of your life, but each day that ends in success is its own reward.
